Be Your Own Best Friend

Redstone.jpeg

Last night I was in between sleeping and dreaming when I heard two owls hooting to each other.  I love owls.  This is what they were talking about..


 Language. 
The power of language. 
The quality of our self-talk. 
Our relationship with ourselves and what has become normal in our society. 
The fact that so many of us have come to so effortlessly say that "we are our own worst enemy" .  Just typing it makes me cringe.  The idea that "I could be my own worst enemy" seems like the deepest crime against wisdom that we could be committing. 
Instead of being our own worst enemy, may we instead befriend + love ourselves deeply. 
May we be at peace with where we are right now in this moment and trust that we are always expanding into more.  This all sounds good, of course, we all KNOW we should TRUST the unfolding of our lives and as My teacher Coby Kozlowski always says there is a difference between knowing the menu and tasting the food.  Knowing that we can TRUST ourselves and ACTUALLY TRUSTING ourselves, what does that even look like?  I believe it starts with being unwilling to be my own worst enemy.   I am much more interested in being my own best friend and that starts with being aware of my thoughts, being aware of my language.  People often say 'thoughts are things' what if with every thought we are planting a seed of potential for ourselves and if we keep fulfilling this prophecy that we ourselves are creating there will NEVER be a chance for true freedom within. 
So, I am calling on you for the sake of the good of humanity to BE YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND.  How can we reframe our language by saying something like this instead:  "Everyday in every way I am getting stronger and more confident in who I am and what I am doing, I am powerful and I am loving". 
How will you consciously choose your language today?  Please leave a comment, I want to know what you think.

HOOT! HOOT!

Inner Critic, take a backseat.

Inner Critic Photo.JPG

Do you ever get caught up with your inner critic?  Silly question, right?

Since this answer is inevitable how can we push ourselves to not settle with getting taken over by something so silly?  How can we empower ourselves instead of getting caught in this cycle time and time again?  I want to help you begin to put this part of yourself that my teacher likes to call your GREMLIN in the back seat and live fully into your truest essence.


In this post, I want to not only explain the gremlin and their sneaky ways, I also want to give you the tools to manage your gremlins in the moments they are coming on super heavy, AND ways we can get curious about their reasons for trying to keep us from honoring the radiant being we already are and expanding into even more as human beings.

So, What the heck is a Gremlin?

Let me explain..

The concept of the Gremlin was taught to me by my wise teacher Coby Kozlowski.  She so eloquently speaks about your gremlin being the part of you that strives to preserve the status quo in your life, also known as the self saboteur.  It is that part of you that questions your capability when you decide you want to do something different or make a change that would significantly make a positive impact on your quality of life.  The gremlin tells you things like "I am not enough just as I am" whether that be skinny enough, pretty enough, young enough, old enough, wise enough and the list goes on and on.

The thing about the gremlin, though, is that even though it can keep us from moving forward in positive ways and making real and powerful shifts for ourselves it also can serve as an ally.  

An Ally?  Yes, I said it, an ally.  This was difficult for me to understand at first and when I really took the time to get curious about my gremlins (yes, there is more than one) the more that I realized that as much as they get in my way, they have also served me in some capacity as well.  

Because our gremlin can also be our ally we never want to shame ourselves for having these gremlins.  The fact of the matter is: We all have them and they aren't going away.  

DEPRESSED?  Well, there is more.  Keep reading.

CONFUSED?  Let me give you an example of how one of my gremlins has helped me and how they also hold me back.

I call this one the Rebel:  the rebel likes to go against the grain of society when everyone says "no" the rebel says "yes" and vice versa.  This gremlin has helped me to do things that others only dream of and on the flip side this sneaky little thing puts up a lot of unnecessary fights in my head about the way things should or shouldn't be.  

So the best way to tame a Gremlin? 


Step 1: Begin to Notice

Get to know your gremlins. 

Invite them for tea.  Ask them questions.  What triggers them and makes them come alive?  Think back to the earliest interaction you can remember with this part of yourself.  Journal about your relationship with this gremlin and how you might like to interact with this gremlin next time you feel them coming up.  Get honest about the ways in which certain aspects of yourself serve you and also hold you back.  

Step 2:  Use your breathe and feel into the moment fully

When we are willing to be fully present and engaged with our emotions without judgement while breathing deeply and connecting with our body we realize there is nothing to be afraid of in any emotion and it is all just energy.

Step 3:  Commit to the Process

Remember that there is no destination. This is an ongoing and lifelong process and if you are committed to it, yourself and your growth life will be a lot more enjoyable.  We are continually unfolding and there is always more to come.  
 

The Good News:


The gremlin is not your natural state - Your natural state is that of the OBSERVER the wise, pure essence of you that integrates knowledge and wisdom effortlessly.  I also like to access this part of me by doing a future-self meditation.  More to come on that.  The gremlin is the one that interjects and tells you what a load of bull all of this is.  

Who do you choose to listen to?

If you are interested in discovering more about your gremlins I am happy to talk more about this idea with you.  Also, there is an amazing book called Taming Your Gremlin by Rick Carson.  I highly recommend it.  

Please leave a comment below.  What is your experience with taming your gremlin? How does your gremlin show up in your life?

 

Spring Cleanse: Day 3 Check In

Cleansing is a process and my first three days are proof of that.  Like childbirth, you remember and then you forget, to some degree.  I am not necessarily comparing cleansing to giving birth but the idea of something concealing itself and then revealing itself certainly applies. When I undergo this process I know that my body will react in ways that I cannot predict.  In this case all the days have been completely different.  It is like my wise teacher Coby Kozlowski always says, "how can you ride all the waves of life?" How can we show up for whatever is showing itself in this moment without judgment? This video gives you some insight into what the last three days have been like for me.  

Day 2:  Was particularly interesting.  As I said in the video, I woke up super grouchy and wanted to blame everything outside of myself for the way I was feeling.  My body as I knew it was moving through detox and was not feeling comfortable.  All of the things that were not perfect in my life were front and center and I didn't want to look at them.  Luckily, these days, I am able to catch onto myself quicker than I was able to in the past.  In this case it took toward the end of the day for me to speak my truth and let the veil be lifted.  Clarity ensued and through the clarity I was able to get my focus back on track and feel good in my body and in this process.

I Look forward to seeing how the rest of the days unfold.  I will keep you posted.  

Step into the FIRE: Spring Cleanse Part 2, IT BEGINS

cleanse pic.jpg

The time has come, last week I wrote about the steps to prepare for your cleanse now is the time to step into the FIRE.   What do you WANT to get out of this cleansing process?  

I would like to share with you what I will be doing for the next 7 days beginning Monday, April 9th.  Please refer to my previous post to learn how to prepare for your cleanse and to decide what level you are prepared to cleanse:  Are you a MILD MEDIUM or HOT?

This spring season I am going for MEDIUM TO HOT.  Reducing my engagement in social media but not eliminating it completely.  As for sugars and caffeine, sayonara!

When I cleanse, I like to keep things as simple as I can for myself which means that I often eat the same things every day.  Having two young kids to keep up with, I want to ensure my success in this process.  I know what works and keeping it as simple as I can, purchasing the ingredients that I need for the week before my cleanse begins are all vital to my success.  

Here Is what my grocery list looks like: **I do ensure that all ingredients are organic**

Veggies: Kale, Chickpeas, broccoli, bok choy, avocado, lemons, limes, all fresh sprouted greens

Cooked beans: yellow lentils, black, garbanzo

Other: coconut milk, kimchi, miso paste, ghee (clarified butter available at any health food store), ginger, turmeric, spices of fennel, ginger, cumin

gluten-free grains: quinoa, buckwheat, brown basmati rice 

Even though by now, I have a pretty good idea of the things I like to prepare, it helps me to print out a piece of paper with my daily routine/meal ideas and put it on the fridge for quick reference and as a reminder of what I am doing, just in case..

Breakfast/Morning Routine:  

Start the day with cleansing breaths.  Warm Detox Tea and Journal for at least ten minutes.  Try and incorporate a morning meditation, even if it is a few minutes of breathing.

FOOD: fresh fruit/veggie smoothie, miso soup,

My go to: Kitchari, (traditionally made of yellow mung dal (yellow lentils) and basmati rice, along with digestive spices and ghee, is used as a cleansing and detoxifying food in Ayurveda.) sauted veggies(kale and sweet potatoes) in ghee.

Lunch/Afternoon check in:

Drink Detox Tea and put your legs up the wall for 10 minutes.  Notice how this feels in your body.  I am sure there is evidence to support this and you can google it, but a yogi friend once told me that 10/15 minutes of legs up the wall is equivalent to a 1 hour nap.  Hey, it can't hurt to try! Maybe even get your kids in on it.

FOOD: Kitchari and vegetables I will mix it up using kimchi and garbanzo beans.  

Fresh veggie salad with avocado, pumpkin seeds, olive oil, lemon and sea salt.

 Dinner/Evening: 

Take an Epsom salt bath and add your favorite essential oils.  Take it up a notch and give yourself a self-massage with whatever oil suits you.  Coconut is cooling, sesame is warming.:

FOOD: hearty veggie soup like coconut milk sweet potato with fresh ginger and kale.  I always sauté my veggies in ghee before adding water. Kitchari with vegetables.

Dessert/Snacks:  If you are feeling like you need something sweet choose apples or celery and some kind of nut butter like almond butter. Popcorn made with ghee

I basically use the same ingredients for most meals and just try and change it up as much as I need to and sometimes I don't need to at all.  Go with what feels right for you.  If you need a lot of variation keep changing it up.  As I said above, I like to keep things simple, it is imperative to my success.  I don't like to fuss about food when I am cleansing which is why when I prepare my grains in the morning, I make enough to last me the entire day.  And to ensure freshness I only make enough for one day. 

Beverages: Yogi Tea: Detox Tea, Traditional Medicinals has a great detox tea as well.  You can find either of these at your local health food store.  Water with lemon/lime

Things to know

1. The first couple of days will be the hardest.  Your body will do all that it can to remind you that you have stopped drinking caffeine.  If you can get through the second day it gets a lot easier.  I promise!

2. Sip on detox tea throughout the day which helps the detoxifying process.

3.  Never go hungry.  Try and eat enough during meal times.  Don't be shy with the portions and try not to snack in between meals.  That said if you do need a snack go right ahead.  I mentioned some snack ideas above.

4. To intensify the detox get your body moving every day.  Because you are eating different your energy will be different.  I suggest low impact exercises like walking or yin yoga.

Even one day of cleansing is great for your body AND by really getting clear about what you want out of this cleanse is something to establish before you start AND it will help you push through and make it through the whole week.  What happens for me is that I feel so good by the 7th day that I almost always want to keep going and I do!  It inevitably changes my awareness around how I am nourishing myself.  My mind is more calm more stable more grounded and my life feels more intentional as a whole.

Good luck with this process and please contact for me or leave a comment below and let me know if you have questions, need additional resources, or would like to let me know how it is going for you!!

Happy Cleansing!  

 

All I CRAVE is connection: Spring Cleanse Part 1

close-up-fern-green-56852.jpg

I love the energy of SPRINGTIME, it is oh so delightful.  Nature flourishes this season and we are meant to flourish too.

There is more light, more sun, more warmth, more flowers, and the promise of much more to come.  AND, the truth is, In order to gather the energy that we need for this springtime BURST, we must shed the heavy coat that has served its purpose.  A NEW LIFE awaits.

TO HARNESS ALL OF THIS creativity our Body must be up to the task.  A Spring CLEANSE can help to hit the reset button on our health.

These are my top 3 reasons to cleanse

1. A crystal clear mind

2. More connection to my body and my purpose

3. Truly thriving rather than surviving

As beautiful as these reasons sound the reality is that a cleanse takes planning and commitment. We have all been in that place of saying we want and are going to do something and when the time comes, it never happens.  Well, let me just say: I am unwilling to let you settle for anything less than what you want from your life. Here I have presented 4 steps to getting clear on your springtime cleanse, which is a chance for our body to get up to speed and to get in peak condition for what is already here and all that is to come.

Get Clear on Your Cleanse

Step 1:  The Clearing

  • Go through your house (food, cleaning supplies, and personal care products) read through the ingredients and get rid of foods that are high in processed sugars and have ingredients that you don’t know or understand.  

Step 2:  Length of Cleanse

  • Choose the how long you want to be on your cleanse.  Even one day can be beneficial 3-7 days will create more impact on your overall health and vitality.  Believe it or not when you get into the rhythm of what works sometimes you feel the urge to keep things going.

Step 3:  Level of Impact

  • Decide how far you want to go and in that create some clear boundaries for the duration of your cleanse.

Mild: Avoid all animal foods, refined oils and processed sugars

Medium: All of the above plus eliminate all caffeine and even high quality sweetners like raw honey, maple syrup, and coconut sugar.

Hot: All of the above including news, TV, internet, and socially related smart phone use.

Step 4: Make a Plan

  • Map out each day you will be on your cleanse so you are clear about what you need to buy and the time you need to schedule to meet your goals.  Choose the life and food rituals that you can commit to 100%

My challenge to you is to spend some time thinking about what commitment means to you.  Set yourself up for success by looking at your calendar and deciding when a good time to start would be.  Make a plan of what could get in your way. Let me know in the comments what your favorite cleanse for springtime entails.  How do you prepare yourself?

Spring has Sprung

spring equinox.jpg

Here it is, SPRING, the promise of new life, possibility, excitement, new beginnings, the time to shed our thick coats that lasted us through the winter.  Coming out of our nest and into the light, the sun, and the promise of more warmth to come. This time of year I feel a surge within my heart. A surge to start fresh to begin again to cleanse my body and my mind to put all of the winter’s creativity into movement and action.  

I love the wisdom of these words by John O’Donohue from the poem For a New Beginning from his book: To Bless the Space Between Us
 

Though your destination is not yet clear

You can trust the promise of this opening;

Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning

That is at one with your life’s desire.

 

Awaken your spirit to adventure;

Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;

Soon you will be home in a new rhythm,

For your soul senses the world that awaits you.

 

Here are my Top 3 Ways to honor the equinox within my own heart.

1. Take a walk and connect with the Earth

2. Light a candle and journal about the questions I list below

3. Create new momentum in my life by making a new commitment to myself.

        (Spring i.e. cleanse and create a next action list of ways I can get started.  


The most powerful 3 questions we can ask ourselves during this universal shift:

1. Where in my life am I ready for a new beginning?  

2. Where in my life am I ready to make a new commitment?  

3. What am I willing to shed so I can create a new way of being with myself?

As we reflect on the words of John O'Donohue and the questions the equinox beg us to ask ourselves, I get very curious about the notion of becoming more comfortable with being uncomfortable or in his words 'learning to find ease in risk'.  What would it look like for us to step into the fire of transformation?  For the sake of living an inspired life.  

 I would love to hear the ways you celebrate the momentum of spring.  Leave a comment below and let me know what powerful shift you are ready to take in your life. What are you willing to let go of?